The Sin of Self Neglect

I recently worked with a private coaching client for 3 months. She came to me because of her struggle with overwhelm, stress, and not being able to prioritize her personal well-being.  She leads a large ministry alongside her husband, as well as being the matriarch of a big family.

She wanted to create more order in her life, home, and work so she could feel a greater sense of personal peace and well-being. She wanted to have time for herself and the things she enjoys. She felt buried in her responsibilities and couldn’t see a way out.

In our work together, she discovered that subconsciously she had been believing a lie that the needs of her husband, children, and ministry were greater than her own. Everyone was more important than her.  So she neglected herself to meet the needs of others. This wasn’t once in a while. It was her lifestyle.

It was a painful discovery for her to make. As a devout believer, she immediately recognized this was an ungodly belief that had been running her life for a long time, causing her to neglect her own well-being. lifestyle.

Session by session, we partnered to challenge that limiting belief.  By the end of our time together, her transformation amazed both of us.  She had not only re-discovered a love for herself, but she had also fallen more in love with her spouse, children, and life in general.  All because she discovered the truth:  she mattered just as much as everyone else.

Self-neglect is not godly or pious. It’s actually you harming you.  It is as much a sin as harming or neglecting someone else because God loves you as much as He loves anyone. In fact, He commands you to love yourself as much as you love your neighbor: truth:  she mattered just as much as everyone else.

“…Love your  neighbor as yourself.”  Matthew 22:39

The key word is “as” which means equal to. The truth is you are not more important than anyone else, but you are also not less important. You are just as important.

Healthy self-care is treating yourself with the same love, concern, compassion, and generosity as you do everyone else. Not more than, but equal to. That is the space you must hold to guard against selfishness and self-worship, which is on the other extreme.

Here’s a question for you: Are you guilty of self-neglect? If so, will you forgive yourself? Will you open your heart to learning how to love yourself as much as you love others?

Spread the word.

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